Today is a winding road

well i think i'm going to use this from now on, i need a place to vent where nobody cares of what i say.

I'm so stressed right now, and i'm so confused with life. I dont know who to turn to and who i can talk to without anybody judging me. Even if they dont give advice or help, i just need to talk to somebody where they will actually listen, not change the subject and start talking about themselves like they couldn't care less of how i feel. Honestly with some of my friends i feel like i could kill myself and they wouldn't care. I feel like i'm just another person who hangs out with them and they only talk to me to be nice. Well you know what? If they weren't my "friends" i would feel better than them saying they are my friends and then have them go behind my back and start talking about me and saying shit about me. I dont know who are really my friends and who are just pretending.