total breakdown

Well graduation was good. You know, i wasnt as excited for it as i thought i was going to be. It was all just kind of a big blur to me and i dont know why but i just wasnt...happy when i was there. The grad party was ok, i was the first to go to bed because grad made me sooo exhausted. 2 days after grad i dragged my dads butt with me to calgary when he came down, so he could sign to get my belly button done. It didnt really hurt that bad, it felt more weird than it hurt.
Work still sucks ass, now we are open 24 hours, im not working the graveyard shift though, i refuse. I think its to scary and dangerous with all the retarded kids in this town. Not to mention what i have heard so far, i think i would lose my mind. Sometimes its 2 hours before they get a customer.
My moms liquor store opens today at 10am. Im so excited and happy for her. Yesterday i helped her get ready (putting price labels on everything, putting booze away) from 11am-7:30pm...and i already worked from 5am-11am before i went there...thats like working 14 hours striaght!! haha i worked more with her than at my real job that pays me money.

Last night i broke down, i just lost it. My grandpa isnt doing good, he hasnt been doing good for months now. He is pissing and shitting blood, has high blood pressure and is losing weight fast. They think its stomach cancer. I grew up with him, he's my only grandpa i have known. I was ALWAYS at his house playing, having sleep overs. Going camping with them every year. I always thought he would be around for such a long time. He is only like 67. I thought he would be here for when i got married, or to be the grandfather of my first child. But now...he even thinks hes not going to last long. I dont know what to do. He lives in Saskatchewan near my dad...thats 12 hours away. If he can't make it down this month (he wants to see family...just in case) then im making an emergency trip there. I dont care if it costs me an arm and a leg, or if i cant go to college right away b/c i dont have enough money. I have to see him one last time b/c i dont know how much longer he will be here and i dont know if i will ever see him again.